At lunch today I saw a young man in a restaurant wearing a nice summer straw, stingy brim hat. Unfortunately he was wearing it INSIDE the restaurant - big no no. For a moment I was stunned - I couldn't believe anyone would do such a thing! Then I remembered that I'm a bit biased when it comes to hat wearing. He was a very polite young man; he had probably just never heard of a such a thing as "hat etiquette" So, now that hat wearing is making a comeback, perhaps a review of hat etiquette is in order.
A very basic rule of thumb is "on outside, off inside".
Of course, there are about a million exceptions to such a basic rule...
-when inside you can leave your hat on if you're in a public area, but take it off if you're in a private area.
Not a bad exception. Except...what constitutes public vs private?
-Inside a home (even when its not your own) is private. Bank and other building lobbies are public, but inside someone's office is private. Elevators are even more specific - the hat comes off if its an elevator of an apartment building or a hotel (that's a private dwelling), but can stay on if the elevator is in a public building. Hats should be removed when entering a church.
Confused yet? It gets better:
Emily Post wrote in her 1959 book "Etiquette: The Blue Book of Social Usage" that “A gentleman must take off his hat when a woman enters an elevator in an apartment building or a hotel, as those are considered dwellings. He puts it on again in the hall, because a public corridor is like a street. In public buildings, however, the elevator is also considered public, and the hat can stay on.”
Everyone got that? Ok, on to the next set of instructions. Remember, we're still working under the basic rule of "on outside, off inside"....
- its common courtesy for a man to remove their hat in the presence of a woman. He may replace once she passes by or if they start walking together.
- Once a man removes his hat, he should keep the inside facing himself. Never show the inner lining of the hat.
Oh, did I mention that all those rules are just for men? Women have their own set of guidelines:
-A woman's hat is part of her ensemble, so it is not necessary to remove it when going indoors. However, this is only during the day. Hats are not proper with evening attire - unless the hat is part of a dinner suit ensemble. Hats never go with evening gowns. And all daytime hats should be removed at dusk.
- A woman should remove her hat in the theater if it interferes with other people's view.
-Another icon of etiquette, Amy Vanderbilt, states “Women should keep their hats on in homes holding christenings, weddings and funerals, because in those occasions the house is treated as if it were a house of worship.”
-Both men and women should remove their hats for National Anthem, unless the woman is wearing a very formal hat (read: integral part of her hairstyle). If the woman is wearing a baseball cap, it comes off.
Now that we're all clear on the ins and outs of hat etiquette, there is one more thing to remember - and this is an important one: Men don't tip their hats to other men. Its considered an insult.